What does God eat?

Scribe: God, Brian_H asks “Do you eat? What's your favorite food?”

God: THANKS FOR THE QUESTION. THE SHORT ANSWER IS THAT I DON’T EAT.

Scribe: You don’t? Oh man, you don’t know what you’re missing. Steak, sushi, pizza, ice cream--

God: OK. DOWN BOY.

Scribe: Chocolate!! Holy crap, you’ve never tried chocolate?!

God: I’VE NEVER EATEN CHOCOLATE. AND CRAP IS NOT HOLY.

Scribe: No chocolate. It just boggles the mind.

God: WHILE I DON’T EAT IN THE SENSE THAT YOU AND BRIAN_H DO, YOU HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT I CONSUME EVERYTHING.

Scribe: You consume everything but don’t eat? That sounds like one of those “What Am I?” riddles. You know: I have eyes but don’t see. What am I? A potato.

God: I’M NOT A POTATO.

Scribe: That’s not what I meant. Can you explain that “consume everything” concept?

God: I DON’T EAT FOOD BUT I CONSUME IT IN THE SENSE THAT I “EXPERIENCE” IT.

Scribe: Sounds like a theme park ride – “Chocolate: The Experience”.

God: I EXPERIENCE EVERYTHING – EVERY SPOKEN WORD, EVERY EMOTION FELT, EVERY THOUGHT CONCEIVED. SO WHILE CHOCOLATE HAS NEVER CROSSED MY LIPS, I’VE EXPERIENCED THE EXHILARATION IT BRINGS TO THOSE WHO EAT IT.

Scribe: You have lips?

God: IT’S A FIGURE OF SPEECH.

Scribe: I knew that.