Thursday, December 07, 2006

Is there really a heaven?

Scribe: God, danaG asks “Is there really a heaven?”

God: HEAVEN, I’M IN HEAVEN. AND MY HEART BEATS SO THAT I CAN HARDLY SPEAK—

Scribe: God sings?

God: WHERE DO YOU THINK MUSIC CAME FROM?

Scribe: Right. So what about heaven?

God: WHAT DO YOU THINK?

Scribe: I’ll go with “yes”.

God: WHEN I AGREED TO BE INTERVIEWED, I KNEW SOME PEOPLE MIGHT TAKE IT AS AN OPPORTUNITY TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF SOME OF THE BASIC MYSTERIES OF FAITH. LIFE AND DEATH, HEAVEN AND HELL -- THOSE KIND OF THINGS. SINCE FAITH IS BASED ON NOT REALLY KNOWING SOME THINGS FOR SURE, QUESTIONS LIKE THIS ONE PUTS ME IN A PICKLE. DO I TELL OR NOT?

Scribe: Well we don’t want to put you on the spot—

God: GOOD. LET’S PUT YOU ON THE SPOT INSTEAD.

Scribe: Me?

God: SURE. WHY NOT?

Scribe: I don’t know much about religious stuff. I thought you picked me as scribe because I take great dictation.

God: WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO LOSE?

Scribe: Um, OK. I’ll give it a shot.

God: SCRIBE, DANAG ASKS, “IS THERE REALLY A HEAVEN?”

Scribe: Like I said before, I’m going with “yes” on this one.

God: IS IT A PLACE?

Scribe: Probably not. I’d say it’s more of a state of mind.

God: CAN YOU ELABORATE?

Scribe: I don’t know. A mental state. A higher consciousness. Where you’re totally at peace.

God: NICE ANSWER.

Scribe: I was right?

God: I’M NOT SAYING.

Scribe: Was I warm?

God: SCRIBE!

Scribe: I must’ve been warm.

God: NOT TELLING.

Scribe: Darn.

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