Birds Can Fly. Why Can't We?

Scribe: God, sanderific asks "Birds can fly, why can't we?"

God: SURE YOU CAN FLY. DELTA'S GOT GREAT RATES NOW THROUGH THE END OF THE YEAR.

Scribe: I don't think that's--

God: I WAS KIDDING.

Scribe: God's got a sense of humor?

God: HAVE YOU NEVER SEEN A PLATYPUS?

Scribe: Right.

God: WHY STOP AT QUESTIONING FLIGHT? DOESN'T HE ALSO WANT TO KNOW WHY HE CAN'T CURL HIS TONGUE? CAN'T HOLD HIS BREATH UNDERWATER? CAN'T RUB HIS BELLY AND PAT HIS HEAD AT THE SAME TIME?

Scribe: I don't know.

God: MY POINT IS THAT ALL CREATURES HAVE A SET OF ABILITIES UNIQUELY THEIR OWN. YOUR SET IS WHAT MAKES YOU YOU. BIRDS GOT FLIGHT BUT LACK MANY OF THE THINGS HUMANS HAVE. AS A SIDE NOTE, I'LL ADMIT THAT I DIDN'T ORIGINALLY PLAN ON GRAVITY.

Scribe: It wasn't part of your "Master Plan"?

God: NOPE. IT WAS A BY PRODUCT OF CREATING THE PLANETS AS LARGE AS I DID. AN UNINTENTIONAL SIDE EFFECT. KIND OF LIKE THOSE GUYS WHO DISCOVERED THE GLUE FOR POST-IT NOTES WHILE TRYING TO DEVELOP A SUPER GLUE.

Scribe: You're likening gravity to Post-It Notes?